Many of us have heard of the story of Job. How he lost everything, and it seemed like God allowed it but there is a statement that he made that gives a whole new look at his story.

Job 3:25” For the thing that I fear comes upon me and what I dread befalls me”.

Could it be that he called his fear into existence? The word of God does say in proverbs 4:23 “keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life”

This means that what is in our hearts could become our reality if we do not take care of it with the word of God.

I have always wondered how people who were abused become the abuser or how people who have been abused end up with abusive partners. The crazy thing is that they are tough and guarded with other people but when it comes to their abusive partners, they are submissive.

Another case is of people who have grown up poor and have developed a fear of poverty. They live their lives trying to acquire all this money because of that fear but later end up being poor.

This fear and trauma have become a spirit that torments its victims and makes them believe they are safe with it.

The Bible says in proverbs 23:7 “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he”.

What we think of what we fear can become a reality if we continue to feed it and refuse to allow God to heal that part of our lives

It is also scientifically proven that the way we think about ourselves can become our reality and that thoughts are catalysts for self-perpetuating cycles. What we think influences how we feel, how we view life. We begin to feel the emotions that were triggered by these thoughts even if is not the same situation

For the question of why abused people protect their abusers or become their abusers?

It is called Stockholm syndrome when a victim of abuse identifies and attaches or bonds positively with their abuser.

This also can be spiritual.

“For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” Ephesians 6:12

When someone has been through abuse, let us say for example they have gone through instances in which people are constantly betraying them or lying to them, they begin to distrust all people and build high walls and defence mechanisms. Not knowing that that trauma has become a spirit that lies to them, saying they are better off being by themselves and that every time they meet someone, they must guard themselves because they will do the same as the others. And because this is a constant thought and it is in the heart it always becomes a reality with all their relationships, a self-fulfilling prophecy.

The spirit that is tormenting this person is an abuser that this person has become familiar with and comfortable with.

God can save you from your enemies, but he cannot save you from enemies that have become your friends.

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, “I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Therefore, go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you, and I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty.” 2 Corinthians 6:14-18

When we say we have given our lives to Christ, it is not just parts of us that God wants, He wants every part of us.

The enemy thrives in darkness. The area we refuse to allow God in is the area the enemy will continue to operate in.

We must be naked before God for him to help us. That is what total surrender means. You cannot say that he is Lord over your life, yet you only allow him to help you in areas you want him to.

Genesis 2:25 “And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed”.

The enemy wants to isolate us, make us believe that God cannot handle our past. Therefore, God asked Adam and Eve in Genesis 3,” who told you that you were naked?” Because before they were so free with God. They had nothing to hide.

* Are you surrendered to God?

* Have you surrendered your attitude, habits, fears, traumas to him?

* Has your trauma or fear become your frenemy?


“I appeal to you, therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect”.

I have heard a lot of people say this “this is just the way I am so you must accept it” but have you asked God if that attitude is from God, or it is a result of the trauma you faced? Have you asked him whether the way you treat yourself and others is from God?

Why are certain things triggers for you?

God is the one who knows who you truly are, not your past

Ask God to search you of every attitude, behaviour, fear, phobia, habit that you may have been seeing as normal, but it is not of God

Surrender all those things to him, allow him to help you and bring light into that area that has been dark.

God loves you

He will not hurt you

Not everyone is on a mission to hurt you

Not everyone is your abuser

Not every action from people around you is a sign that they are going to do what your abuser did.